The Wealth Effect

Ever hired a real life personal assistant, not just a VA for emails, but someone to handle the logistics of your life? I did, and it led to an unexpected clash of values and a shocking accusation. Join me as I talk about the complex relationship between money, personal values and the surprising ways abundance can trigger judgment and even hostility. It’s time to explore the emotional friction around wealth and how understanding these dynamics can unlock your true potential for financial success.

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I’m Igor Kheifets, and this is the List Building Lifestyle, the podcast for anyone who wants to build a wildly profitable email list working from home. If you’d like to make six figures, travel the world and help people improve their lives in the process, this podcast is for you. I also invite you to claim a free copy of my best selling book, the List Building Lifestyle Confessions of an Email Millionaire at igorsbook.com. Get the free book plus $3,000 bonus package that includes my best capture page templates, email swipe files and traffic blueprints. Visit www.igorsbook.com for details. And now it’s time to claim your List Building Lifestyle.

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At one point, I hired like a personal assistant in real life, not like a VA to do my emails, but like a person who would come into my home, you know, maybe take the kids somewhere, you know, help out with this, with that, like somebody who would like, not necessarily do laundry or anything, but literally, like help around the logistics of stuff. It’s like booking a trip somewhere, you know, like organizing the schedule for the week, you know, returning stuff from Amazon to the post office, like stuff like that, because it was becoming quite time consuming for Anastasia to do. And she was a girl who grew up in Poland and then moved to Canada, and she lives in the north, I mean, north, like an hour away. So she was driving here a few times a week. And she has this very frugal old school kind of, like the Great Depression kind of mindset. 

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She’s, like, saves every penny and stuff like that. And she saw the way we live, and she saw the way I treat money, which means I can, I can literally spend a couple 100 bucks on something silly as coffee. And she, at one point, got so upset, she disappeared for a week and then sent my wife an angry email. It was 1000 words big. Maybe at one point I’ll even publish it somewhere where she urged my wife to leave me and take the kids right away, because I was a bad person, I was toxic, I was inconsiderate. I was this and that. Basically, she almost started a full out war against me, trying to convince Anastasia to leave me. It was quite crazy, and it’s like I took it personally. 

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I was like, I was genuinely offended, because I never said a bad word to her. I never treated her badly. But it’s like something about having money makes you a bad person. We had a student a couple years back who told the story about getting your promotion at work at one point and buying a Cadillac to celebrate it, then inviting like an old time buddy of his, like his best friend, for dinner, taking him out for dinner with his wife, and then never hearing from the guy ever again. You know, I don’t think it’s jealousy. I think sometimes it’s a matter of, look at them. They have more abundance, and it’s like, if they have it, and I don’t, it means they’re, like, more intelligent, smarter, whatever, um, a lot of times, many times, people try to justify being poor. That’s the one thing I’ve never understood. Like, I’ve never had that myself, where it’s like, as if they’re better, a better person if they don’t have money. 

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But you know, that’s just not true. I’ve met a lot of people, poor people, and again, what I consider poor is basically just get by, barely get by. You know what I mean? Always struggling, always kind of trying to save a penny here and $1 there. Um, I’ve met a lot of really bitter, angry, low, emotional IQ people who are like that. And I met a lot of people who are very wealthy, much wealthier than me, and they’re great people. They’re like, extremely intelligent, they’re great friends. They’re just people that I look up to, and I say I want to be more like that person. Now, to the same extent, I’ve met people who are poor, who are amazing people, and people who are rich, who are just douchebags. You know, it doesn’t take away from their, you know, financial success. But, like, personally, I wouldn’t want to hang out with them when I just leave and I feel I have a bad taste in my mouth, like, it’s just, I don’t like that person. So having the amount of money you have, or the or the income you earn, doesn’t make you a better or a worse person has nothing to do with it. It’s absolutely like, not connected, if anything, what it can do. 

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It can just multiply the kind of person you are, because your impact can be multiplied, like if you’re a genuinely good person. Having more money allows you to give more money to the charities, support, and your church to help your loved ones. Like one of the first things I’ve done when I started making more money, I started giving more money to my parents. Like I said, I had an allowance that I was giving to my brother for a couple of years. I bought an apartment for my parents so they don’t have to pay rent. Other you know, extended family members obviously showed up asking for money. We paid with Anastasia, we paid for obviously, was her idea. We paid for my mother in law’s dental work, which is very expensive. 

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It’s like we’ve done a lot for our family. I didn’t necessarily support any charities at the time, but we’ve done so much for our family members that we just wouldn’t be able to do without money, and did the same tune Anastasia’s brother, older brother, who had money, by the way, because he was saving up since he was, like, 14 or something, and always like work, jobs, etc. When Anastasia’s mom went asking him for money for dental work, he said, No, so her son in law paid for that, not her actual son. Like, whether you make a lot or whether you make little doesn’t change the kind of person you are at all it has to do with, do you understand how money works? You understand how the market works? Do you understand how marketing works? Can you get a high converting offer in front of, like, a hungry market? That’s what it’s all about. 

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It’s not about, Are you a good person? Are you going to hell or heaven? It’s really not about that at all. In fact, I’m pretty sure, and I could be wrong about that, that in the Bible, there are passages that talk about, you know, getting wealthy or getting, you know, becoming richer because you become more giving. You become more open, you become less bitter, you become less preoccupied with surviving, and you now have the bandwidth to listen to people’s problems and to resonate, to empathize with them. You know, it’s really people tend to confuse these things, and that’s why I recommend reading something like the Trick to Money is Having Some because the author really makes that argument about, like, if you’re experiencing emotional friction about making a lot of money, you need to address that, otherwise money will just not come to you. 

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Thank you for listening to the List Building Lifestyle. Get access to the previous episodes, transcript of today’s show, as well as other exclusive content at listbuildinglifestyleshow.com. Also remember to claim your free copy of my best selling book at www.igorsbook.com, it explains how I made millions with list building starting from scratch, plus I’ll give you $3,000 worth of free bonuses, including My best landing page templates, email swipe files and traffic blueprints. Go to www.igorsbook.com now to claim your free package.