Why You Shouldn’t Show Them You’re a Real Person

Here’s the cold hard truth:

Your prospect doesn’t care.

She doesn’t care about you.

Your product.

Your life or anything it.

All she cares about is…

“Can you solve my problem? And if you can – HOW?”

Here’s how to answer this question in a way that gets people to want to learn more about what you do.


This program is brought to you by the ThePodcastFactory.com.

Hi, my name is Igor Kheifets and this is the List Building Lifestyle, the only podcast
which delivers cutting edge conversion strategies from the online trenches straight to
your earbuds. Download the transcript of today’s episode and all future episodes at
listbuilidnglifestylesshow.com. I also invite you to grab a free copy of “The Wealthy
List Builder’s Survival Guide” at listbuildinglifestyleshow.com/survival and now
once again it’s time to claim your List Building Lifestyle.

Igor: Welcome back to another edition of the List Building Lifestyle. I’m your
host Igor Kheifets. Back in 2008, I started out marketing an online MLM called
Global Domains International. The first thing I had done was build my squeeze
page. It was a really long squeeze page definitely not the kind of squeeze page I
build today and to get people on my list, I was using GetResponse at the time, and
I tried to get traffic from social media. Now let’s just skip the part where for
the first year I didn’t get any traffic whatsoever and the whole “fake it till you
make thing” didn’t work and spamming people on Facebook and MySpace didn’t work.
Back in the day, MySpace was actually a thing kind of what Facebook is today. So
just let’s skip that part and skip all the way to the point where I’m getting
traffic but nobody is buying. I go ahead and I reach out to my upline Jodi and I
say, “Jodi, something is wrong, for some reason no one is joining.” And what is
boggling my mind is that I’m marketing a $10 per month thing. I mean it’s really
cheap, anyone can afford it and it makes a lot of sense because you get a whole
website and hosting account for that money even though today you can get it for 3
bucks a year. I’m like, “Jodi, what’s going on? How come nobody is buying?” And
Jodi gives me the one piece of advice that I still hear today from other marketers
that I believe is one of the most ridiculous, most misleading and most progress
stealing advice you can get as a brand new marketer in the business opportunity
and MLM space online. And the advice goes something like this: Oh yeah, you know
what you need to do is you need to just show them you’re a real person, show them
you’re a real person. Really? Okay. Now I don’t know any better. I’m a newbie so I
go ahead and I show people that I’m a real person. I did a series of YouTube
videos where I literally walked them through my apartment which at the time I was
living with my parents so the apartment is really, really bad.

Remember I immigrated to Israel, we struggled for a really long time, and we just
lived in just shit holes. We moved eight times in like the first six or five
years. It was ridiculous. It was painful. It was a pain in the ass and honestly if
you had seen the place I live back then you’d think, “Man, this guy has it good
right now. He made it. He made it from the bottom of the barrel to the cream of
the crop so to speak.” So anyway, I shot a series of YouTube videos showed them my
apartment, I showed them like I would tell them life stories. I would tell them
about how much of a real person I am. What I’m doing right now, I’m about to be
recruited into the Israeli Army, basically I walked them into my life. Then I
write a series of emails which is pretty much the same thing and these emails
focused on my day to day life, on my personal experiences, on my family members,
everything, stuff like that so again I’m sure you have been told the same thing.
I am sure you have been told to talk about your family, talk about your kids, talk
about your spouse and stuff like that. And of course, at the time, I’m also trying
to blog so what I’m doing is taking all that stuff and I put it on my blogs so now
I’m thinking, “Yes! Now they know I’m a real person.” Sure, because I got a blog
and my blog has a bunch of videos of me on it and then you got a bunch of emails
as well if they joined my list talking about me. It was me, me, me and it was all
about my life. So if you joined my list honestly, there should not be any doubt in
your mind that I’m a real person or at the very least that I’m very creative at
making up a persona that seems like a real person because I laid out everything.
I became so honest, so open with my lead even though I didn’t have many that I
told them the things that I never told my parents and my best friends. I thought,
“Man, if I’m going to do that I’m going to disclose secrets and I’m just going to
be talking about my personal stuff, people will see I’m a real person. They will
trust me and they will automatically want to buy from me.” Well, I was wrong.
Anyone who tells you that, anyone that tells you to show them that you’re a real
person is also wrong because that doesn’t work. People don’t care. They don’t give
a shit if you’re a real person, they honestly do not. The only thing that people
care about is themselves and they don’t care if they are buying a solution from a
real person or not; what they care about is that if that person that is offering
the solution and the person that is standing next to the solution that they are
marketing is that person creditable in the topic or the area of expertise that the
solution is in and is that person honest enough. So they don’t care as much about
who you are and where you come from as they do are you telling the truth. They
don’t care if you’re using an alias to sell the hemorrhoid cream online or
whatever because it’s an embarrassing industry. It’s an embarrassing problem to
have but what they do care about is if the advice you’re sharing is legit and that
is not something that they can actually tell if you tell them about your family.
It’s not something that they can know if you talk to them about the baseball
practice you went to with Timmy the other week. It’s not something they can know
if you tell them about your brother-in-law who’s jealous of you making money from
home. It’s really not. What they want to know are you genuine; are you honest, and
that is something you create through two mechanisms.

The first mechanism is tonality. The mechanism that allows you to sound confident
and sound like a creditable, sound like somebody who knows what they are talking
about if you talk right, if you deliver the message right, if you simply maintain
a proper even tonality when discussing the solutions yourself. Again try to
imagine somebody who sounds like this (feeble voice), “So buy my shit, buy my
product. This cream will get rid of your hemorrhoids in just four days.” So try to
think of somebody who sells the hemorrhoid cream like that and somebody who says,
“This is the best hemorrhoid cream on the market. You should get it right now
while you still can and it comes with a 30 day money back guarantee.” So obviously
the second example tells you that this guy or gal, maybe it is a woman selling who
knows but this person sounds like they know what they are talking about. They
sound confident. They sound even while the other people may sound like they are
trying to get your approval and that’s not someone that we’ll ever buy from. It’s
not a person that we’ll ever do business with that is just the subconscious honest
signal that we send out. So the first thing is tonality.

The second thing that you absolutely have to do if you don’t have creditability
and if you want to come across as a creditable authority and without having to
necessarily tell them about your personal life details is storytelling. Now the
beautiful part about storytelling is that first off, the story does not have to be
true even though if you have more moral standards that you have to maintain, you
will be able to tell the true story but the story does not have to be true and the
story does not have to be yours. So you can actually tell someone else’s story and
establish yourself as a creditable authority. In fact, what’s going to happen when
you tell stories that people kind of you know put aside their logical objections
for a bit and they get emotionally involved with the story. That’s really
important to remember because when people are logical and rational, they will
never be able to make a decision. In fact there was a study done where a person’s
amygdala which is the part of the brain that is responsible for really powerful
emotions like fear and lust and anger and all that stuff, right? So animals for
example that have large amygdala they are really aggressive; crocodiles for
example. So the guy’s amygdala was damaged during a car accident and his emotional
capacity got hit. Like he was not getting emotional at all so this dude changed
completely, he stopped recognizing his family members. He was able to maintain and
to kind of conduct very logical and rational conversation with you but if you
asked him to make a decision of any kind, he was simply not able to do it. So this
is why they say, people buy using their emotions. People make emotional decisions.
Every single decision that you make, every single thing make, every single
decision that you will ever make in your life will be first and foremost an
emotional decision because it sits in the amygdala without it you won’t be able to
decide. Therefore if you want to elicit buying decisions from your potential
customers you have to appeal to the emotions and stories do that incredibly well.

Now I can’t do justice to story-selling and story-marketing in single maybe even
like a series of podcast episodes so if you would like to learn more about how to
sell using stories, and specifically how to recruit people into your business
opportunity using stories without having to make claims, without lying, without
standing on hype, without talking to them in person then you should check out my
brand new, Guide to story-marketing and to bridge page marketing which is
basically a system, a nine step system where I show you how to build a bridge page
that tells a story that gets people emotionally engaged with you and gets them to
join you in business. Again even if you have no proof, even if you have no
creditability, even if you have no street cred then go to
www.bridge.igorsoloads.com for more details. So thank you again for tuning in for
another episode of List Building Lifestyle. This is your host Igor Kheifets and I
will talk to you next time.

Thanks for listening to The List Building Lifestyle Show, make sure to
subscribe on iTunes or Google Play to never miss an episode because who knows just
one conversion tactic we share on the show might double your list and double your
business. Download the transcript of today’s episode and all future episodes at
listbuilderslifestyleshow.com and don’t forget to claim your complimentary copy
of “The Wealthy List Builder’s Survival Guide” at listbuildinglifestyleshow.com/survival .
This is Igor Kheifets until next time we talk, have a good one.

This is the ThePodcastFactory.com.

Who Is Igor Kheifets

Igor Kheifets is the 3rd highest-earning super-affiliate in the internet marketing niche.

Igor’s 2-step system has helped him consistently rank as the highest-earning and the highest-converting (measured in commissions earned per click) for industry’s leading vendors including but not limited to Matt Bacak, John Crestani and Anthony Morrison.

Igor boiled down success in affiliate marketing to a set of predictable easy steps anyone can take to generate commissions.


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