Connecting with Purpose And Unlocking Big Wins with Kevin Thompson

I’m Igor Kheifets, and this is The ListBuilding Lifestyle. The podcast is for anyone who wants to build a wildly profitable email list working from home. If you’d like to make six figures, travel the world and help people improve their lives in the process, this podcast is for you. I also invite you to claim a free copy of my best selling book, the list building lifestyle Confessions of an email millionaire at www.igorsbook.com
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00:52

Welcome back to the ListBuilding Lifestyle, I’m your host. Igor Kheifets, and today I’m hosting Kevin Thompson. Kevin is not only a successful entrepreneur, but also a connector who values relationships over transactions, affectionately known as “The Kevin, The Connector”. He has built a reputation for bringing people together, in a way that transforms lives and businesses.
Kevin is the founder of Impact And Legacy Collective, a community facilitating real, meaningful and long term aligned relationships with like minded entrepreneurs who work together to make a positive impact and leave a lasting legacy.

Kevin is also the host of The Million Dollar Relationship podcast, which aims to inspire and motivate people to create a more meaningful, profitable and rewarding relationships in their personal and professional lives. Kevin believes relationships are the most valuable asset anyone can have!

Over the years, he’s helped countless people break through barriers by creating meaningful connections that open doors, cut through red tape and lead to incredible opportunities! So Kevin, welcome to the list building lifestyle.

01:57 The guest, Kevin Thompson

Igor, man! you make me sound great, I want to know more about this guy! Seriously, though I am just totally honored to be here, and I’m looking forward to having this conversation today, Igor!

02:10 Igor Kheifets

Yeah, same, because, you know, my experience in business has been, that most people treat relationships as transactions! So, you know, they kind of want to quid pro quo, if you will. Or usually when somebody starts a relationship, my favorite by far, is when somebody starts a relationship with a pitch, right? So it’s like, “Hey, Igor, my name is so and so, and I run the company that does this and this, and it’d be great for you to buy my stuff”. You know, that relationship! My favorite type! definitely makes me want to invest in it

02:46 The guest, Kevin Thompson

yes, by the way, as fast as possible.

02:49 Igor Kheifets

So, I’m happy to bring you on, because, even in the brief time that I’ve known you, The way you conduct yourself, the way you treated me so far, It all screams that you’re in it for the long haul, It all projects a different vibe! And I’d really love to talk about it because, not only from a perspective of business relationships in general, but also because here in The List Building Lifestyle universe, we are building a relationship with our list as well, because that’s the primary asset, the biggest, by far, the most profitable asset that I believe anyone can have! And so this relationship equity, both in terms of your joint venture partners, your customers, as well as your personal life, your family members, your friends, all that comes together to become, like you’re saying, one of the most valuable assets anyone can ever have!
So, let us kick things off. And my first question to you would be, I guess, How did you earn the nickname Kevin The Connector? How did that come to be, and why did you decide to to build a presence career, or otherwise, your life around relationships?

04:17 The guest, Kevin Thompson

Yeah, so I used to own a publishing company for 12 years, and that business grew at such a high pace during that 12 years, and it was because I was partnering with other entrepreneurs. I was doing strategic partnerships with other entrepreneurs who helped me get my message out into the marketplace and stuff, and that business would have never grown that way, if not for those partners! And so, I was just incredibly appreciative for all those partners. In a 12 year period, I did over 400 strategic partnerships!

And what I was always looking for in conversation was, like you said, I did not want to reach out to entrepreneurs, saying, “hey, you know, would you pitch my stuff?” So I always just, I love talking with entrepreneurs, I love finding out about what they’re working on? what’s got them jazzed? what problems they’re having? what challenges? what opportunities they’re trying to take advantage of? And my mind just always naturally defaults to, well, “Who do I know that might be able to help them, with what they’re telling me about right now?” And so I would just make those connections!

And you know, Igor, I’ve told a lot of people about that over the years. In fact, Dan Sullivan, of Strategic Coach, you know, he calls this unique ability that we have, we all possess this unique ability. Or it could be multiple things, that we are just god given gifts that we have, that we’re just really good at it.
And for me, you know, being able to piece those things together and see like, oh, you need to talk with so and so let me get you connected! That’s been a natural gift of mine for I don’t know how long, but the whole time I was running that publishing company for sure. And so I made a lot of connections for other entrepreneurs during that time.

And as a result, I just created, like you said, goodwill with people. And what happens when you just treat other people, right, They naturally show, “well, Kev, tell me about what you’re working on and what’s got you jazzed and excited”. And they naturally want to know, because you just, you make them feel good and stuff, and they like you, and they’re just like, they want to help.

And you know, you talked about relationships, Igor, when we have a real and meaningful relationship with someone doing business just comes so easy. Because, like I said, you like that person, you like what they stand for you, you know that they are just really amazing at doing the thing that they do.
And for me, making these kind of connections! that stuff jazzes me, man! Because people come back and they’re, like, incredibly grateful for that, and I like being the guy who does that stuff. So!

07:17 Igor Kheifets

Yeah, I think there’s a lot to be said about how people enjoy doing business with people they like, and I think a huge principle that I noticed that you sort of, operate under, even though we never like, consciously spoke about it with you, but I sort of see it, is people don’t don’t care how much you Know, or what you got or what you sell, until they know how much you care! And you know, I think a foundation to a great relationship is not so much doing favors for each other, but it’s taking interest in the other person’s world!

So there’s a great -I always refer to it with my students, and they probably should do a better job referring to it with my daughter- But there’s this great one word persuasion course, and it’s basically go something like, people will do anything for those who encourage their dreams, allay their fears, throw rocks at their enemies, confirm their suspicions, and and one more thing! But it’s basically saying that, people will do a lot for you, if you know the other person or take interest in the other person’s affairs! you know what they’re thinking about, what they’re afraid of, what they want, what they suspect, and, you know, hopefully you can help them get what they want as well. That’s, I think, a foundation for a really good relationship.

And from that, you will usually, you can expect great business relationships to flourish! Because I remember going to my first seminar, and I was like, I was much younger, and I was like, I mean, I grew up in Israel, and it’s really shoot straight kind of country where people just say like it is, right? So, I’m going to the seminar, I spent a few thousand dollars to be there in between the seminar, ticket, the hotel, the plane, and I’m thinking, I’m going to make the most out of it, right?

So anytime I meet somebody, I go straight for like, I just say, hey, you’ve got an affiliate program you should promote. And I just keep on pitching people.
So when I came back home, I had, like, a long list of people that I connected with, I followed up with everybody, and no deals came from it. And I spoke to a friend of mine, who’s I always considered a mentor. He’s an Israeli internet marketer, and he’s been in the game for much longer than me, very experienced entrepreneur as well, and he says, “You gotta do more schmoozing”. I was like, “what! schmoozing?” It’s like, “yeah, you gotta do more schmoozing”, “what is that?” He says, “Well, just don’t talk about business, just, you know, hang out and, you know, just be with people”. And I started doing that, and that changed everything for me, yeah, because that allowed me to focus on relationship first, transaction second! And as a result, my joint venture network grew up exponentially!

10:37 The guest, Kevin Thompson

Yeah, absolutely! When we do focus on relationship first. Like I said, you know, when we have that real, meaningful relationship, doing business comes so easily and stuff.

And, you know, and just the thing is, you know, and I couldn’t articulate this for the longest time, but you know, I love talking with entrepreneurs, like I said, and when we start at, you know, one of my favorite questions to ask an entrepreneur in a new conversation is, “What are you working on right now that’s got you the most jazz, the most excited, the most inspired!” You know well, they’re going to tell you about, and not only that, they’re going to get pretty animated, as they do, because the more they talk about, the more excited that they get, you know, and then based on what they’re sharing, you know, because I’m really interested, then I end up asking clarifying questions based on whatever there is, that they’re sharing with me.
And what happens is, is we end up giving people this gift that they so-seldom get to receive, which is the gift of feeling Seen, Heard and Understood!
And when we just ask questions and listen with the intention of listening and better understanding them, not with the intention of waiting for our turn to talk. And so we can pounce all over them and tell them about our thing and what we do and all of that! But just genuinely listen because we’re interested in learning more about them and what they’re doing and what they’re working on!
And I’ll tell you, when you give people that gift, they totally remember that, and it’s long been said, you know, “People remember how we make them feel far more than anything else that we could possibly say!”
And it is totally true and that, you know, you want to create real, meaningful relationship that leads to great business as well? Just genuinely be interested in other people!

12:51 Igor Kheifets

I agree, you know, it’s funny. I read that phrase, “People will seldom remember what you say, but they will always remember how you make it feel”. I read it when I just got started online. It was many years ago, I never truly understood the meaning of it until probably sometime this year! Like I really didn’t know how to implement it in my life. And I think you’re absolutely right when you say that most people are sort of waiting for the return to talk, which is the first time I heard someone talk about, I think it was Stephen Covey in The Seven Habits Of Effective People, because I just had my daughter, I read it a few months ago, andit’s so true. That’s what happens . . and, you know, I find it obviously, I do it myself as well, I’m not perfect!
But I think it’s really annoying when people do that, because you don’t feel heard and you don’t feel understood! It’s like they’re trying to bulldoze their point of view!

Recently, I reread a book that I highly recommend for anyone who wants to learn how to listen, because you mentioned that, listening intently is very important! I think it’s a skill set that must be developed. I don’t think most people have that as a skill. And a great book about that is, How To Talk So Kids Will Listen And Listen So Kids Will Talk, by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish. This is an amazing book, it’s for parents, on how to talk to their kids, because kids have their emotions, you know, flowing in!

And I think the advice applies to adults, I think if you talk to adults as if they’re kids, and you listen to them as if they’re kids, you can go a long way with forming a really meaningful and strong relationship, because, like you said, they will feel heard and they will feel understood and specifically for entrepreneurs, that is so rare! Because entrepreneurs go around every single day, bumping into a million different challenges, being told, “No, you can’t do this, and you can’t do that”, you know, trying to pursue a goal, and on the way there, they have to, you know, basically agree to pursue different agendas, to have favors done for them, and stuff like that. So, it’s just refreshing for an entrepreneur to be heard and understood!

15:23 The guest, Kevin Thompson

Yeah, absolutely! And when we show up as the person who just allows that to be, you know, So I’ll give you an example, I got invited to an event just this last month down in Phoenix. I live here in Seattle Washington area, and I got invited to this, like a small gathering of entrepreneurs. There was like 13 of us that were there, and I knew the guy hosting the Get Together. And so when he invited me, I know who he hangs out with. So I knew that, like, if I go to this, it’s going to be the right kind of people, for sure, you know!

And I didn’t expect that I was going to run into an old friend of mine who was also at that event, that I had not seen in, actually, nine years! And we caught up and picked up our conversation like it was just yesterday! When him and I reconnected and stuff
And, you know, one of the things that he shared with me, well, a couple of things, you know, he had started a new business 12 months ago. That is, in 12 months, they’ve already done 2 million in revenue, and he estimates that in the next 12 months, they’re going to do somewhere between five to 8 million. He’s like, “Kevin, the business is growing like crazy!” And the other thing that he shared was that since we last spoke, he has become a father. He now has four kids, ages two to eight . .I’m like, Man! I was like, “Nate you’ve been busy!” And he’s like, “The most perfect thing that you and I got reconnected now”, Because he’s, “I remember how you, years ago, were so intentional about structuring your business, so that it would support the lifestyle you want to live and allow you to be the husband and father that you wanted to be!”. And he’s like, “Kev, man, that hits home with me so much right now!”. He’s like, “That is top of mind for me”. He’s like, “This business is growing, but I don’t want it to grow for just gross sake, and I want to be the husband and father that I want to be, because I am already experiencing man, the time is going to go by fast, and I don’t want to miss out on anything!”.

And so we, you know, he’s just like, man, “I want to talk with you more about this because it’s so important to me right now” , but, you know, I share all that because Nate and I hadn’t seen each other or spoken in nine years! But yet, we had such an amazing relationship that when we got reconnected in perfect timing, that relationship picked up and we didn’t miss a beat!

And that’s what happens when we focus on like, I want to show up this way! I want to have these kinds of relationships in my life, that I can be useful for and that they can be useful and helpful for me as well! That it’s a back and forth thing that we just, and we do it not because, you know, we’re focused on the revenue or what have you that we just were focused on the relationship! And the impact that we can make together, and I will tell you: our relationship was cool nine years ago, but both Nate and I have grown immensely in that nine years, and our relationship now is going to be way more valuable. And, heck, I even get kind of goosebumps thinking about it right now, because I’m so stoked for what Nate and I are going to be doing together, you know! And we’re going to make a huge impact, and revenue is the natural and organic byproduct of doing that, of focusing on, how do we make our biggest impact and stuff!

19:26 Igor Kheifets

Right, You make a great point there, so a couple of great points, actually! One and I was just having the same discussion with a friend of mine. He asked me, How often do you talk to your best friends?

And I said, you know, some of them once a month, and some of them once a year, because, you know, I ended up moving, and they’re still in Israel, but it doesn’t feel like it, right? Every time you pick up the phone, you’re like, continuing the conversation from like, two minutes ago!
So, it doesn’t feel forced, he doesn’t feel like you have to start from scratch! You just carry the conversation. It’s very easy. It’s a very effortless!
And I think not every relationship is going to be like that, but many will, and those are frictionless. This is where you can create, you know, lots of impact with very little friction.

Now, the other point you’re making is that, because Nate changed and grown, and because you changed and grown, the impact of your relationship is gonna have today or in the coming year, is going to be much greater than what it could have been 10 years ago, nine years ago! I think that’s also an amazing point, because you never really know where a friendship or meeting somebody may take you in three, five, seven, ten years from now! Though, that’s usually unknown and not every relationship obviously is going to become something super big!

But every now and again, somebody you’ve known for many years and haven’t spoken to, end up reconnecting with them and then ends up sparking a new business, reviving an existing business, and taking that to the next level, where otherwise somehow ends up changing your life!
I’ve literally just had something like that happen to me. A relationship started about 10 years ago, and then for many years, it became dormant, not because we had a fight or something, just because we never, like, really connected over the years, and then it got reignited about four months ago, ended up flourishing into something a lot bigger, a lot more beautiful, a lot more personal! So that’s really cool!

Let me ask you a slightly different question, kind of sharing some of your wisdom for people who have trouble with relationship building with networking specifically, For many months now, I’ve been part of different networking events, and I must say 90% of them suck! And they suck so much that I had to start my own networking event, and I’m hoping that the people who attend my events don’t think it sucks!

Generally speaking, okay? networking events are boring! They’re very formal, and it’s difficult to build meaningful relationships because everybody’s just pitching each other! So what tips can you share for somebody who, first off, goes to these events and wants to make the most out of them. And second, people who might be naturally more conscious or more reserved, and therefore they have a much harder time opening up and connecting with people?

22:54 The guest, Kevin Thompson

Yeah! So we’ll start with the, because I used to be way more reserved when I was younger and stuff. And I don’t know why, I wouldn’t have call myself an introvert, but I just wasn’t, like, really outgoing and stuff!
And I think a lot of it was, is that I felt like I needed to somehow carry the conversation, and didn’t always feel comfortable in doing that, versus when I learned that, you know what? No, you don’t need to carry the conversation at all. You seem to ask some really good questions and let people talk and listen. That’s what you need to do!
And I’m like, Oh, well, I can do THAT, you know? And I’m like, wow! And it just kind of, took this weight off my shoulder feeling like that I had to carry this whole conversation because I didn’t at all!
And it was just it completely transformed the whole doggone experience and stuff!

And now, what, you know, like making new connections, if I’m initiating connection, it’s really simple, because whether it’s in person or what have you, you know, I’ll just compliment somebody on something! you know.

So at an event, you might have, you know, where you hear somebody else share. So I was at an event earlier this year. And the first speaker at the event was this guy, Gareb Shamus, Gareb is the founder of Wizard Media and Comic Con. And Comic Con is a big, huge deal! And two months prior to that, one of my other friends had shared with me about a 2 million$ comic book collection, that they were wanting to liquidate most of and stuff.
And, at the time he shared that with me, I heard it, but I’m like, you know, that’s not in my wheelhouse! But yet, too month later, six weeks later, I’m at this event, hearing from this guy, Gareb Shamus, and so on the first break, I’m just like, wow! I went up and I introduced myself to him, and I said, you know, I would love to have lunch with you, if you’re open to that. And I just really appreciate what you shared! And he agreed to have lunch.

And so we had lunch that day, and at lunch, I told him about my friend, and he was, you know what? I can totally introduce him to buyers! And so I was able to get those two guys connected.

And I share that because, you know, when we go to these events, It’s a finite time, so whether that event was a two day event, for example. So, you know, we know when we go there.
And there was about 200 entrepreneurs at that event. So a lot of people go there with the mindset of, “I need to connect with as many people as I possibly can, because this is only a two day event, and I need to make hay while the sun is shining!” That’s the mentality they go into it. And so they’re like, you shared going to that first event and telling everybody about what you do, this and that! Talking to as many people as you possibly can, and even following up afterwards, and in the end, like, you end up with nothing!

And the reason was, you went wide, as a lot of people try to do, they go wide, trying to talk as many people as they can, and it doesn’t really connect, versus if you go there with, you know what? I know, this is a two day event, what if I was able to make real, meaningful connection with three, four, five or six people during the course of that two days!
And all we do is, do what we’ve already been talking about Igor! We just ask people questions about what they’re working on? What they’re most jazzed about? And let them start sharing! And we just make those real, meaningful connection! And I will guarantee you, you’re going to have a whole different experience, and so will the people that you come in contact with.

So I will tell you, those two guys that I got connected, they’re doing some really big stuff together right now! Because I happen to be in a position and in that venue, in that event, at the right time to meet that guy and have the foresight to just ask him to lunch and then tell him about my friend and be able to facilitate a connection for those two guys! They’re doing some really big things together now, and they’re going to make a big impact, And when that happens, and we do that with the right people, you know what? They appreciate us, they take care of us too, and stuff.

And so, you know, even if you’re a little bit introverted or what have you, don’t feel like you need to carry the conversation. And all you need to do is ask one or two good questions and let them talk, and then, based on what they’re sharing, you just ask more questions!

And then they’ll start asking questions of you. And Igor, kind of like you’re asking questions of me, right now. All I’m doing is sharing my own experiences that I’ve already had!

There’s, you know, we could, any of us can totally do that. And so, you know, you take some of that weight off your shoulders and just show up and be! And don’t feel like, you know, go so wide and just talk with anybody and everybody, but just make real, meaningful connection, and you’re going to have a whole different experience and a whole different outcome!

28:49 Igor Kheifets

I agree with you when you say that you don’t have to carry the conversation and that you don’t have to put like a giant spotlight on yourself and pretend you’re this amazing overachiever, right? You really don’t have to do that.

I think the greatest advice that I’ve ever received regarding how to make good conversation, was exactly what you just said, just ask good questions, like meaningful good questions!

And the first time I heard it was in Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends And Influence People. This book is timeless, It’s been written like, I think, over 100 years ago now, or close to 100 years ago, but the principles are still exactly the same!
First, you introduce yourself, which, is actually, by the way, I used to always struggle with that. I would somehow end up with conversations we’re 30 minutes in, I would not only introduce myself, but I would not even know what the other person’s name is!

I’m not exactly sure how that happened!
So I started getting into conversations by extending my arm and just saying, “I’m Igor”, you know, kind of like, you know, “I am Groot from the Marvel” movie’s like.

And that’s enough for the other person to be like, first, some of them would be like, what? Oftentimes that’s actually like, 50% of time, that’s what I get. I was like, “I’m Igor”. And they’re like, Oh, I’m sorry, I’m Jeff, you know, I’m Stephanie.

And so from there, you can start asking questions, and it could be something as simple as, just like you said, where you’re working on right now? I recommend avoiding, as I call them, Type Form Questions or questions that you expect in the job interview.

It’s like, What is your name? How old are you? Where are you from? You know, stuff like that.
So, get rid of those! Instead, you know, focus on people, on what’s exciting for them, just like you mentioned earlier,and talk about, oh, let’s say you meet them at an event. So ask them, “So, you know, what are you looking to get out of this event?” Have them tell you their ideal outcome. Maybe you can help them achieve it! So I think that’s tremendous!

And I also find it interesting how sometimes luck, pure, maybe not luck! but pure coincidence, plays a major role in forming incredible strategic partnerships. Like you go into that event, hearing the guy who invented Comic Con, ends up you, connecting him to the other guy with a 2$ million comic book collection, and this possibility that didn’t exist before is created just because that guy told you about the collection, and few months later, you go to that event!

It’s not a system that we can repeat all the time, but it does happen more times than you’d expect!

31;41 The guest, Kevin Thompson

Yeah, totally! You’re right in that, those kinds of things just show up! But I will also say, you know, I fully expect that, now! Because I’ve had that happen a lot in my life, and it happens a whole lot more now, because the more I grow as a person, the more conversations I have with the right kind of entrepreneurs, and that I just remain open . . for me personally, you know, Igor, it’s not so much about facilitating relationships, facilitating strategic partnerships, or any of that! So my buddy with the comic book collection, I’ve known him for 13 years.He’s a very successful entrepreneur. I have got to know him really well over those years. I absolutely love who he is as a person! How he shows up! He is making a massive impact in this world, through his business, through the work that he does and all of that!

And the thought of being able to help him in that way, I was so dangerous about that, and seeing what ultimately came from that, and the conversation that those two guys had. You know, it’s it. I would never bring anybody into his life, if I thought for one second that it would damage the relationship that he and I have already had for 13 years.

And so I’ve always and quite candidly, I look at that with anybody in my life, you know. That’s how I like just view relationships, and I always want to be in service and helping those people in my life. I always want to be, Bring people into their life that will help further the relationship that we already have. And I kind of, you know, view myself as this conduit of trust for them, and I’m always just going to show up that way. I don’t say that particularly, but I’m just showing up that way, and that’s how I see it in my mind. And because I’m also just kind of, this vessel, if you will. I’m using my gifts and abilities to the best of my ability.

And so of course, opportunities are going to come , because who better than to serve those people than me?

And so I expect that, and when we expect it, more things happened. And so, you know, it’s interesting how that works. Versus, you know, when we kind of like, oh, wonder, can it happen? Versus, I expect this to happen, and I want it to happen, and I want to be that kind of a conduit for the people in my life.

And when we expect it, we get more of it and stuff. That’s how the universe works!

34:47 Igor Kheifets

I think what you just described is very powerful, in a sense that oftentimes entrepreneurs on their way to either building their business or running their business, they end up stumbling into something, they end up accidentally pulling something off, something good happens without them consciously planning for it. And I think the smart entrepreneurs such as yourself, what they do is, they make it happen more on purpose.

I look back on my journey and oftentimes success did not really work out the way I planned. It, like in my mind, I had one vision, one plan, but then on the way there, I would accidentally do something that would end up getting me to my goal in a different way, but still getting to the same goal.

So when you accidentally end up connecting people and create big impact, just because you happen to know both of them, and this one for 13 years and this one for 13 minutes, I think you’re very smart to spot that, and then expect it, and, or take the steps, I guess that would make something like that happen on purpose, just, maybe something as simple as now being open to connecting with people from literally every industry, every walk of life, every niche, every business, every genre, every age, every you know, country, etc!

So even if you’re focused on, you know, for example, e commerce these days, which I know you’re not but I’m just saying, like, let’s say you focus on e-commerce, you’ll still take a phone call with somebody who’s into, I don’t know, building, you know, AI automations, or, you know, posting Comic Con, yeah, because you can then create this energy that on paper doesn’t make sense! On paper, they’re not connected!

But we can’t know for sure, we can’t see all the possibilities often until they hit us in the face. I really like that, I genuinely like that!

Let me wrap up, with two questions. First question is, if somebody wants to connect with you, if somebody wants to be part of the universe, where can they go, and what can they do?
And the second question would be . . I guess, if you could go back in time and meet yourself, say 20 years ago, just spend 60 seconds talking to yourself, knowing that you would take your own advice. What would you tell yourself?

37:25 The guest, Kevin Thompson

So, that’s a biggie! So I’ll start with that, I used to look at other entrepreneurs, especially entrepreneurs who I thought were incredibly successful, who had achieved far more than I felt I had achieved in my own life and in my own business, and I would kind of put them on this pedestal, and I did that for years, and going back, I would let myself know that Kevin, you know what? We’re all doing the best we can with what we have, and these incredibly successful entrepreneurs, what I have discovered is that, their circle of people that they can truly trust and confide in, is very small! And when we just show up and be that person, and Kevin, when you show up and be that person, man, they’re going to welcome you in with open arms! And you are going to be speaking their language, and you can just show up and just be you.

And, you know, when we can al, just do that. Because when we are in service of others, there is no fear. Which it just feels absolutely amazing when we’re in genuine service of others. And, you know, coming to that realization now, It doesn’t matter whether I’m talking with a billionaire, doesn’t matter what somebody does! they could be the leader of a nation, and I’m just going to be able to have a heart to heart conversation with them, and, I no longer get dissuaded, or no longer feel less than! or what have you! Because of somebody else’s achievements.

And, you know, when we can just show up and be us, and just go into any conversation. My goal is I just want to get to know this person and find out if there’s a way that I might be able to be of service to them!

And even if we can’t, that’s okay too, because giving them, that gift that we’ve been talking about, of feeling seen, heard and understood, we can always do that and give them amazing experience!

And as far as how people might connect with me. I am most active on Facebook, Kevin The Connector on Facebook, and here’s what I’ll do Igor, I’m just going to throw out a challenge really quick, because, there, no matter how successful somebody is, no matter how great things look from the outside looking in, no matter how big of a business they run, there’s not a person on the face of this earth that gets too much appreciation!

And when we are just genuinely appreciative of other people, it is amazing what that will accomplish.

And so I’m going to throw out a challenge for you. What I want you to do, we all have cell phones with contacts in our cell phones. And for the purpose of this exercise, it can be family, it can be friends, it can be business associates, whatever! But what I want to challenge you to do is, over the course of the next 24 hours, you send out 10 messages. You’re going to send out messages to 10 people, and in those messages, you are going to let each of those people know one thing that you genuinely appreciate about them.

You’re not going to ask for anything in return. You’re not even going to ask for a response in return. You’re just going to send out some love, send out some appreciation, and you watch what happens! Do it with 10 people in 24 hours. You watch what happens!

And what’s going to come to light for you is you’re going to realize, you’re going to be like, “Wow, Kev, that was awesome!” And “I want to do a lot more of that!” And the other thing you’re going to realize is that YOU, your actions, caused that to happen!

And that you can also cause more of that to happen whenever you want, just by being genuinely appreciative of other people!

41:39 Igor Kheifets

I really love that advice for two reasons. First reason is because we live in an age of social media, and anytime I get on Facebook, I swear, I feel like the world’s biggest loser, in spite of having done pretty good for myself! Oh, my God! It’s like, “private jet this, and Ferrari that, and I have the best marriage, and my kids have graduated Harvard, and I just want the Nobel Prize and . .” And it’s like, Oh my God. It’s like, what am I doing with my life? You know, I should just go kill myself ( I am such a loser) I swear to God!

And that’s exactly how I feel, which is partially why I got off social media at some point, I realized just not productive to have my self esteem, you know, bashed with a sledgehammer every time I get on there.

So I think for that reason, first reason, that advice is amazing, because we always feel, at least most of us, we feel like less, like you said, we feel less than the person we’re connecting with. And so that’s one.
The second reason I really love this advice, is because I actually did something similar many years ago. I don’t know why I never repeated that, but that day, I felt really down, I just was going like, I guess, just like any entrepreneur you go with, like, the highs and the lows, and that can sometimes be in the same hour, you know! So, I was going for one of these lows, and I was feeling like crap, I was stuck, I couldn’t get any work done! I really just hated myself!

And I don’t know why, but I decided to record a video, share, like, showing appreciation to a couple of people. I always had my camera, because I would record the podcast, and I just turned it on. And I recorded a video for my buddy Craig, and I liked it. It made me feel really good! For some reason, it just instantly changed my vibe! So I ended up doing two more videos, one from my buddy Goer, and another one from my friend Tom, and I ended up sending those videos out.

Now, nothing really happened with those relationships, like in terms of, you know, that didn’t result in a million dollars, but I felt really good! I was immediately able to get back on the proverbial horse, get work done, say good things to my family, you know, kind of feel inspired to live, and it is, because I invested 15 minutes to think and express appreciation to random people in my life. I don’t know why it works, but it works!

And I think the advice, the challenge you’re putting out, especially to those of you who are listening right now and you’re having a bad week, maybe you’ve had a bad six months, maybe you haven’t had any wins lately! You do that, I swear, you’ll feel so elevated by the time you’re done!

44:44 The guest, Kevin Thompson
Yeah, absolutely! Because when we choose to focus on what we’re appreciative of and what we’re grateful for, it absolutely makes us feel better.

I had that same experience, I mean, a friend of mine, my buddy, Jessy, 12 years ago, gave me that same challenge and suggested that I, he’s like “Kevin, he’s at you, send messages to 10 people”. And of course, I overachieved, I sat there all afternoon messaging people and stuff and . . but it was such an amazing experience. And so ever since, like I said, that was 12 years ago, ever since, not a day goes by, that I don’t actively appreciate one or more people in my life. It could be my wife, it could be my children. It’s certainly business people that I know, and all that, people online! That I don’t even know, that I just saw something that they post, and I’m like, I have started new relationships by sending a message of just sending genuine appreciation to somebody for something that they posted online, that they didn’t even know me and I didn’t know them, and we started a relate . . Heck, I did that with one guy, and the next thing, like, minutes later, we’re hopping on Zoom. I mean, he was like, Hey, is that? You know, he said, I’d love to make time. He’s like, “Kevin, I’ve been seeing your stuff, and I’d love to make time to talk with you, and are you open to that?” And I’m like, Sure. And I shot in my calendar link, and I’m like, you can just grab a time, whatever works for you. He’s like, Well, I’m available right now if it works for you. And like, I’m like, Sure. So we hopped on Zoom, and we talked for an hour right then and there, you know, And that was, I don’t know, sometime a year or so ago, and me and that guy are good friends now! We’ve done some really cool stuff together!

But this thing of just being genuinely appreciative of other people. You’re so right, Igor, it makes us feel amazing, too, and stuff.

46:48 Igor Kheifets

And I wanted to point that out for one reason, and that is, I don’t know about you, but I know me, and I’m all about ME, like it’s hard to get me to do stuff unless I see the personal profit in doing that. You know what I mean?

I think it’s a byproduct of being, quote, unquote, a guru. You know, where the spotlight is always on me! But I started looking for ways, some time ago, looking for ways to trick myself into doing things by drawing a clear connection to what’s in it for me.

And this particular thing, expressing appreciation to other people in your life, actually makes me feel so much better, for some reason, and it genuinely, It Feels like my biochemistry changes! Like it’s that powerful!

So, I second your challenge, I join you in the battle cry of, to our listeners, to go and just, you know, try that out and overachieve! Like you said, go beyond the 10. And if you don’t have 10, do three, do five, do seven, do one! Just if you have one person, you really appreciate it off, pick up the phone and call them. You don’t even have to send a text message, make it real! And you know, it can be a really powerful thing that can change the way you perceive yourself, that can change the way you perceive the other person, and can change the chemistry between both of you!

Because, believe it or not, the other person might not know! Like, you might feel like you appreciate them, but they just might not know this, and hearing that from you, might make their day or make their week. And that’s really powerful!

Kev, we’re unfortunately out of time. So how can, if somebody is listening to this and thinking, Well, I got a lot more to learn from Kevin. How can they get into your universe?

48:48 The guest, Kevin Thompson

Yeah, they can hit me up on Facebook, Kevin The Connector on Facebook, and if you do the active appreciation challenge, and I would love to hear about your experience! And so, just shoot me a message on Facebook and tell me about your experience, I’d love to hear about that. I do also have a website, and maximum-response.com is my website, and yeah, I mean, you can check that out! You can kind of see some of the stuff we do there.
And, if you’re so inclined to reach out and you want to talk about strategic partnerships, want to talk about relationships, you want to talk about, you know, whatever you want to talk about, and stuff. Shoot me a message! And if I can help out and I can serve, I’m happy to do that!

39:31 Igor Kheifets

Awesome! So that’s Kevin the connector on Facebook and maximum-response.com if you want to learn more about Kevin, if you want to share your experience with the gratitude challenge, as well as if you want to connect with them directly about anything at all. So Kev, Thank you for taking the time to sit down with me today, It was a pleasure, and until next time we chat, have a good one!

Thank you for listening to The List Building Lifestyle, get access to the previous episodes, transcript of today’s show, as well as other exclusive content at www.listbuildinglifestyleshow.com. Also remember to claim your free copy of my best selling book at www.igorsbook.com. It explains how I made millions with list buildings starting from scratch, plus I’ll give you 3,000$ worth of free bonuses, including my best landing page templates, email swipe files and traffic blueprints. Go to www.igorsbook.com, now to claim your free package!